Name: Kushal Shah
E-mail: kushalshah08@gmail.com
Cousins excellent dance performance at Arti’s wedding. =)
Song: Gall Dil Di
Artist: Harjit Harma
Album: Hoor
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Dive Devil!! (Me, Sanskruti, and Vikool)
(Vatodyan I hate you for not coming on this ride with us!!)
“When God solves your problem you will have faith in his abilities, when he does not solve your problem it means he has faith in your abilities.”
— Annonymous
Celebrity Jeopardy: Cosby, Osbourne, Connery
Stimulus vs Bailout
One focus on the economic impact and other on how much it is going to cost you. The funny thing is, they both tell the same story; just different sides of it!

Song: Dil Mein Sanam Ki Soorat
Album: Phir Teri Kahani Yaad Aayi

For those who are falling in Love and are in Love! Happy Valentine’s Day!!

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Economic Stimulus Explained

Sometime this year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. No, they are borrowing it from China. Your children are expected to repay the Chinese.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to Hugo Chavez, the Arabs and Al Queda
If you purchase a computer it will go to Taiwan.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan and Korea.
If you purchase prescription drugs it will go to India
If you purchase heroin it will go to the Taliban in Afghanistan
If you give it to a charitable cause, it will go to Nigeria.

And none of it will help the American economy. We need to keep that money here in America. You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer (domestic only), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses still in the US.

By Barry Ritholtz

Did You Know?
“Everything the Communists told us about communism was a complete and utter lie. Unfortunately, everything the Communists told us about capitalism turned out to be true.”
— John Nellis